Modern ways your mom and mother-in-law can contribute to the wedding plans (without crossing any boundaries).By: Sharon Naylor
Photo Credit: Hailey Erickson Photography
It’s Mom to the rescue with today’s wedding plans! She and Dad might not be paying for the entire wedding, so today’s mother of the bride or groom is finding new ways to get involved and save you money, time, and sanity.
Here’s what the savvy MOB and MOG are taking on:
1. Working Their Networks. Mom is really well-connected! Through her friend circles, work community, volunteering cliques, and social networking friends, she may know someone (who works in a floral shop, bakery, photography studio, or jewelry store) who loves her enough to grant her a "friends and family wedding discount" for you. Or perhaps she has in-the-know contacts who can point you to the best pros in town.
2. Providing Guest List Support. Moms protect you from guest list faux pas, such as inviting Mr. and Mrs. Jones when they actually got divorced three years ago or spelling your cousin's children's names incorrectly on the invitation. Enlist her help rounding up current addresses and the names of your relatives' plus ones.
3. Offering Her Tastes. Today’s mom is often invited to attend the VIP foodie-fest that helps you select your menu options, including your cake. It's a sweet way to make her feel involved!
4. Helping With the Bridal Shower. Some still feel that moms shouldn't be the main host (according to traditional etiquette), but they’re now joining in with the bridesmaids and maid of honor to help put together an amazing shower for you. They can contribute funds or come up with fun details to rescue your cash-strapped and time-crunched bridesmaids, who are all too happy to get her assistance (provided she’s a team-player and not a steamroller mom who doesn’t let them get a word in!).
5. Styling Themselves. Moms are fashion-forward and style-savvy, so they’re consulting with stylists and choosing amazing gowns and dresses. The days of "wear beige" are over – unless it’s a really incredible designer beige dress! – and brides are making it a Girls’ Day Out to help mom pick her wedding day outfit.
6. Planning Their Own Parties. It might be the rehearsal dinner or the morning-after breakfast where they use all of their own great ideas, themes, menu plans, décor dazzle, and more. A new trend now is for the moms to plan their own after-parties for their friends and close relatives: You go off to party with your crowd, and Mom can party with hers.
7. De-Stressing the Bride. It used to be that moms caused a lot of wedding stress, but their role has become a lot more fun and relaxed than it used to be. They’re taking the tense bride out for mani/pedis, planning movie nights, working out with the bride, and listening to her vent without being judgemental. Moms are there for the bride like never before.
Sharon Naylor is the author of over 35 wedding books, including The Mother-of-the-Bride Book: Giving Your Daughter a Wonderful Wedding and The Mother of the Groom: Everything You Need to Know to Enjoy the Best Wedding Ever. She has been featured as a wedding expert on top shows such as Good Morning America, ABC News, Primetime and more. Visit sharonnaylor.net for more wedding tips and advice.