Wedding Invitation Q&As

Composing wedding invitations involves complex-and beautiful-etiquette guidelines. We RSVP to your urgent questions.

Inviting Guests with Dates

Q: My fiancé and his family think we should invite everyone to the wedding with a guest. What's the rule? —Mobile, Alabama

A: You needn't invite every single person to your wedding with a guest. In fact, most couples today don't unless they have an unlimited budget. You should, however, include partners of the following people:
  • Everyone who is married (even if you don't know their spouse)

  • Couples who are engaged

  • Couples who are living together

  • Guests who have had a steady significant other for so long that it would seem awkward not to include their partners.

The last instance is a judgment call, but in most cases your gut will tell you what to do.

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I have a few friends who included a Save the Date magnet in their wedding announcements. It was pretty helpful - I attached the invitation to my fridge using the magnet provided, and then on the day of the wedding, when I was scrambling to get out the door on time, I was able to quickly locate the invitation for directions. For my Save the Dates, I did a postcard. However, I still like the idea of including a magnet in the actual invitations. My invitations will have a pocket for the RSVP card, and I was thinking of including a magnet of my fiance and I there. Would this be OK, and if so, what would be the proper wording on the magnet at this point - would "Save the Date" still be OK?