The actualization of planning our wedding approximately 9530.99 miles away didn't really dawn on my fiancé Luke and I at first. That is, until we started to hit a few hurdles: You can’t meet up with your wedding coordinator next week if you're worried you’re not on the same page and you can’t call up your caterer during your lunch break to discuss canapé options because your lunchtime is their bedtime.
So today I thought I’d share a few experiences that The Boy and I have encountered and had to face head-on due to the lack of accessibility. (Emails are about the only way we contact our vendors and therefore these tips will apply to them as well!)
Photo courtesy of Christopher Robbins
"Uhm, are we going to be cold?" This sounds awfully silly and sometimes isn’t exactly what happens for brides who are getting married where they live. But yes, I did have to ask my coordinator whether I would be cold, since my guests were coming to me with questions such as “Isn’t it winter in America that time of the year?” and “Do I need a coat for both the ceremony and the reception, or just at night?” I recommend that destination brides thoroughly research their wedding locale beforehand—consider giving guests a list of facts about the area or fun activity suggestions during downtime (you can tuck this into your welcome basket or include it in your invitation).
"So you mean Tuesday morning my time, or Tuesday morning your time?" We had to set up World Clock on our laptops and iPhones so that every time I sent an email out, I knew what my chances were of getting a reply that day. Also, our coordinator and I quickly came to an understanding that we were always talking about her local time, since she couldn't possibly keep track of all her brides' GMT +/-, managing so many different weddings!
Photo courtesy of Christopher Robbins
"100% or nothing….? Right?" One thing we've noticed is that everyone is very quick to reply to you when you are a potential client. However, once you’ve put your deposit down and want to talk details, the responses come a little slower. The main thing for me was that I did not want to come across like that crazy bridezilla that all vendors dread, so my emails were always very polite, and if I ever sent two in a day, I would apologize for having “disturbed” them.
Silly, silly me.
Our first wedding coordinator took 10 days to reply to my first email after we paid our deposit. Did it make my heart race every morning when I checked my emails and didn’t see any from my planning team? You bet.
After speaking to my very (obviously) intelligent fiancé, I realized that I am only going to get married once and we were paying hard-earned money to these people for their service. I found the courage to call and ask if our wedding could be coordinated by someone who was able to give us more of their time as we were so far away and had a few pre-wedding woes.
Done and done. Best decision I ever made—our new coordinator is fabulous and very detailed. Like me!
Photo courtesy of Chris Sherburne Photography
"Easy, peasy, lemon squeezy!" Having a wedding so far away does have its perks. Although we have our fingers crossed for a few things, I am glad my schedule is not chock-full with vendor meetings. It gives me the chance to really enjoy this period in my life and let things take care of themselves. I do believe when the day comes, most of the pesky little problems I encountered will probably not matter to me.
Theresa Asks: "What questions do you have about throwing a destination wedding? Leave a comment and we'll try to answer them for you!"
—Theresa Misso
Theresa Misso is a real bride who originally hails from Singapore, but is currently living in Australia. This vintage-loving college student is getting married in Las Vegas (nearly 9530.99 miles away!) in an intimate, 30-person ceremony. Expect pops of color and lots of clean lines in her untraditional November 2011 wedding to fiancé Luke William Anthony.
