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Q. One of my bridesmaids is a tanning-booth-aholic. How can I get her to tone down the Snooki look for my wedding? —Louise
A.This is tricky, as you never want to ask your bridesmaids to change who they are — after all, that’s why you love them! I would only ask this if you were sure it wouldn’t offend her.
Q.I am having a hard time choosing the colors of my bridesmaid dresses for my fall wedding. I love vintage, shabby-chic, soft, pale shades — can I still do them? Or should I go with more traditional fall colors like pumpkin and brown? —Beth
A.Wedding fashion today really has few rules, and as long as your decisions are purposeful, tasteful and carried through your entire event, you can’t go wrong. If you want to combine your passion for pastels with seasonal colors, I suggest adding a touch of soft browns and creams to the mix — fall-inspired hues that are also a great combination with soft pinks, purples or blues.
Q. I am having two maids of honor. One is awesome, the other not so much. She doesn’t want to help with anything. Even though she claims all is well when I ask her about it, I feel that all is not well. Also, my other girls are becoming annoyed and so am I. Would it be OK to ask her to not be in the wedding? —Liz
A. A wedding is really no time for drama, and an official removal from your bridal party will certainly spur that on. And, though this is your special time — you never know what could be the root of the problem. I would start by scaling back on her future involvement and focusing your attention instead on the happy bridesmaids — and on what really matters: your marriage! If the situation doesn’t get better, try having a conversation with her over coffee and asking her if she might prefer another role or perhaps enjoy attending your wedding as a guest instead.
Q. Is it OK or totally obnoxious to ask my bridesmaids to wear the same lip color on the wedding day?—Fifi
A. Of course it’s OK! Bridesmaids should be unified in some way — and with more and more brides choosing coordinating dresses instead of matching — a lip color is a great way to do this. It’s also a lot more cost effective than requiring all your ladies to get a full head of hair extensions! I would even suggest purchasing tubes for each girl and slipping them into a chic little lipstick case for a great keepsake and thoughtful thank-you gift. When purchasing your shade just try to pick a tone and texture that flatters the group’s skin shades — such as a classic red.
Q. What should you do if you can’t decide on just one maid of honor? Is it possible for all your bridesmaids to be maids of honor? —April
A. Lucky you — if you have this many close friends and family members, I suggest keeping things simple by calling them all your bridesmaids or another endearing term for the bridal party (“honored friends,” “friends of honor”).
Q. How do I choose between family (and future in-law) members and friends for my bridal party? I have so many in both groups! —Carla
A.Having too many candidates for a bridal party is actually a great problem to have! I’d say to go with your heart and choose the friends and family members that have known you the longest, or those whom you are closest with. No one can argue this decision! As well, you might want to add a special note in your program thanking all of your family and friends for being a part of your very special day.
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