Etiquette Q&A: "Do I Need to Send a Gift Even If I'm Not Attending the Shower?"

Q. "I’ve been invited to a bridal shower and won’t be able to attend. Do I still need to send a gift? If so, how much should I spend?"

A. Yes, you should still send a gift even though you don’t plan to be there. As far as the amount to spend, it really depends on your budget and how close you are to the bride. There are no hard-and-fast rules as to what shower gifts should cost, and I’m sure the bride-to-be will appreciate whatever you send her.

bridal shower opening gifts
Photo Credit: Katee Grace

If her registry is listed on the shower invite, take a look at her gift list. Most brides sign up for a variety of items in all price ranges, so you should be able to find something affordable.

If she is not registered, ask her family or bridesmaids if there’s anything in particular the couple needs for their home. You might also consider giving her a gift that’s a bit more unique such as a certificate for a spa treatment, antique linens or a decorative vintage mirror. Check out 7 Thoughtful Bridal Shower Gift Ideas.

—Diane Forden