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November 12, 2009

What Not To Say During a Wedding Toast

I'm sure we've all been to enough weddings to know what’s appropriate to say during a wedding toast, but then again, maybe some of us don’t. Sometimes toasts can be well thought out and heartfelt, and other times you wonder if the one giving the speech is drunk or just plain stupid. Face it; it's a lot of pressure to say something meaningful, witty and funny in front of any crowd.

As difficult as it is to put together one of these speeches, I’ve learned during my career that there are certain things you just don't say. Here are three cringe-worthy scenarios to avoid:

• It’s your brother’s wedding and the date was pushed because his girlfriend is pregnant. It probably wouldn't be appropriate to talk about how your brother used to be irresponsible, but now you’re proud of him for taking responsibility for his actions. I would say this may not get many laughs and could very well be your ticket out of any type of relationship you could have had with his wife.
• Your best girlfriend is getting married and you think it would be a great idea to reminisce about your single days and how she always went home with someone new every night. Of course you’d also mention how grateful you are that she found one person who satisfies her every need. No matter how you try to dress this one up, you’re going to be toast when the groom gets to you later. Even worse, your best friend may be so mortified and embarrassed that she regrets asking you to stand up for her and asks the videographer to delete this portion. I wouldn't want to be you!
• One of my all-time favorite scenarios is when the bride or groom has already been married once or twice before and the best man or maid of honor says, “Third time’s a charm,” or “Sometimes you have to try out the merchandise before you place your bet.” Rule of thumb—you never talk about the ex. Not only is this distasteful, but it’s not funny at all. Who would even want to think of any relationship that caused the bride or groom any anguish or pain? Trust me, you’re not doing them a favor by reminding them of their past mistakes. So while you prepare the toast, do everyone a favor and speak of the here and now!

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Posted by Samantha at 12:54 a.m. | Comments (0)

October 29, 2009

A Wedding Fit for Royalty

Have you ever wondered what the richest families in the world can afford for their weddings?

Last weekend on October 25 at the Trump National Golf Club in Bedminster, New Jersey, Ivanka Trump tied the knot with The New York Observer publisher Jared Kushner. One could only imagine that this was most likely one of the most elegant weddings of the decade in this country. What kind of wedding does someone of this stature have?

The answer: A small, "quaint" ceremony with 500 of their closest family and friends underneath a tent with glass walls. The guest list included Russell Crowe, Natalie Portman, Barbara Walters and Regis Philbin. When each person arrived they were handed a beautiful gardenia flower—what a wonderful touch! Golden Chiavari chairs faced a chuppah with cascading crystals, flowers and greens. I bet you didn't know Ivanka converted to Judaism. This is the interesting thing about marriage; you know a couple has given lots of thought into the future when a religion is changed. It shows a commitment in every sense.

Ivanka walked down the aisle in style wearing a couture wedding gown by Vera Wang, which was inspired by Grace Kelly’s wedding dress. Adorned with custom lace and tulle, this gown was classic, elegant and definitely made a statement. She wore more than $265,000 worth of her own fine jewelry collection to accentuate the dress. I would imagine having your own line of jewelry would be most convenient when getting married, right? The bridesmaids were also wearing some of her pieces along with their Carolina Herrera dresses.

Once the reception began Regis serenaded the couple in a room filled with more than one million flowers. The ceiling and walls were draped in ivory chiffon, and centerpieces of all heights and sizes and candles were everywhere. It was romantic yet not overstated. Her planner Preston Bailey did an amazing job of keeping things extravagant, like the Donald would expect, yet beautifully done like his daughter had asked.

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Posted by Samantha at 4:35 p.m. | Comments (0)

October 22, 2009

Do Television Romances Really Last?

Just as I’m about to sit down and eat breakfast, I hear The Bachelor’s Jason Mesnick is marrying Molly Malaney! Just to refresh your memory, Jason was the bachelor who proposed to Melissa Rycroft and dumped her for Molly, the runner-up. I really hope he doesn’t decide right before the wedding that this girl isn’t for him…again.

I’m sorry, but this is so beyond words. Who really cares? I really don’t think it’s going to last because this guy seems like such a commitment-phobe. It's pathetic. know reality TV shows make things more dramatic than they really are—it has to or you would get bored—but was it necessary for him to add more fuel to the fire and create more drama?

The big question is, can you really find true love on a six-week show? I don't know about you, but I think a show about finding love is just not the way to go. It’s already tough to find someone under normal conditions—imagine dealing with that pressure in front of millions of people. You may end up kissing a few guys, maybe even take it a step further, but it's lust...not true emotion. Relationships need to be based on more. Take a look at The Bachelor's and The Bachelorette's track records—how many of these couples actually stayed together? The only person who’s had any real success was bachelorette Trista Rehn.

I have to admit, I found my husband through the online dating site JDate.com. I didn't have time to meet boys through friends and decided to take fate into my own hands. I met my husband three months after he moved to Chicago from the East Coast. It took us a good year to decide to move in together, another six months to get engaged, and a year to plan the wedding. I think it was safe to say we were a good match. But again, in life there's no guarantee.

I felt pretty confident after this amount of time—we were pretty much on a good path to bliss. Well, married bliss. Do the butterflies last forever? With lots of patience and work, it can stay fruitful, but it takes effort. Let's face it, marriage is not easy. Meeting someone on a love reality show just makes it more complicated.

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Posted by Samantha at 2:30 p.m. | Comments (0)

October 13, 2009

Party Like a Rock Star!

Have you ever wondered how some of your favorite stars celebrate before the big day? You’d me amazed how similar their parties are to those thrown by regular folks like you and me!

I thought it might be fun to share some of our favorite celebs’ pre-wedding celebrations. They may have money, but they don't always need to splurge on everything! With the right food and beverages, along with some sexy tunes to shake your bootie, you too can party like a celeb—trust me!

Josh Duhamel and Fergie decided to combine their bachelorette and bachelor parties and invited 75 of their friends for dinner and dancing at the Dakota Lounge in Santa Monica. This is pretty much what most couples today are doing before the main event. The days of celebrating with just the girls are a thing of the past for many. Some brides and grooms even have couples showers thrown for them. Having one big party together allows everyone to hang loose and just be around the ones they care about in a fun environment. No matter how much you have to splurge or where you go, the most important thing is celebrating with the people you know and love!

Rather than having just one big night together, some stars opt to spread the festivities out over a few days. When Britney Spears and Kevin Federline got married, Britney kicked off the wedding weekend with a bachelorette bash at the Fairmont Miramar Hotel while Kevin and his friends decided to have dinner at a nearby Houston’s restaurant. Although the evening started with each group doing their own thing, they all ended the night together with a party at the hotel. The next day they split up again for some relaxing fun—the girls went to the Burke Williams spa and the guys hit the links.

Christina Aguilera didn't take the “cheap” route by any means with her bachelorette getaway. She, along with her bridesmaids and close friends, experienced a four-day (yes, four days!) party at the One & Only Pamilla Resort in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. During the day they basked in the sun poolside and enjoyed spa services, and at night they partied at clubs, including Sammy Hagar's Cabo Wabo Cantina where they danced to 80s music all night long! That's my kind of party! Although, I have to wonder who picked up the tab on this one?

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Posted by Samantha at 3:37 p.m. | Comments (0)

October 2, 2009

Prenup Craziness

Just when you think it's too hard to plan a wedding while pleasing family and friends, try throwing a prenuptial agreement into the equation and see where that takes you! There's something about money and valuable items that makes one start having “what if” thoughts.

Love can make people do crazy things. Money can do the same thing. This was very obvious for Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom who just tied the knot this past Sunday after only a month of dating. Rumors have been going around since their nuptials that the marriage is not legal until the prenup is signed. Apparently, according to reports, the E! channel agreed to pick up the $1 million tab if they had the wedding by Sunday, which was why no agreement was signed prior to the event. Of course, the couple denies that any of these stories are true, but with Lamar just signing a $30 million contract with the Lakers you have to wonder if there’s some sort of post-nup in the works.

This whole business seems a bit crazy to me, but in the celebrity world they’re taken very seriously. There have been some pretty big prenups between celebs that just blew me away. Let's take Catherine Zeta Jones and Michael Douglas. Supposedly, their agreement states that Catherine receives $2.8 million for each year the marriage lasts. Another interesting prenup involves Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. It supposedly says that Katie gets $3 million a year up to $33 million for each year they are married. If the marriage lasts more than 11 years, then the prenup is void and Katie is entitled to half of everything under California’s community property law. Now that's a good way to keep him on his toes!

I don't know about you, but if I were presented with a prenup or a post-nup, I would say, “Good luck!” How do you feel about the trust factor being put on the line before you tie the knot? If you were asked to sign a prenup how would you feel? Do you agree with a financial agreement before you get married? What if you were the breadwinner, would it make a difference?

I look forward to your responses and seeing if Khloe and Lamar make it past the time it takes you to respond!

xo
Samantha

Posted by Samantha at 5:12 p.m. | Comments (0)

September 18, 2009

Getting to Know You

There’s always something so exciting about a celebrity engagement or wedding. They spend countless hours and sometimes millions of dollars to create the perfect day, but it doesn’t matter how much money was spent or which fabulous planners they hired—all of those things won’t ensure that the marriage will last forever.

Sure, having a big, elaborate wedding is fun, but it’s important to keep things in perspective and remember what getting married really means. Sometimes being in love with being engaged or having a wedding is stronger than the love you may have for each other. I suggest putting in the time and effort it takes to really get to know the person you want to be with for the rest of your life. Otherwise, things could end badly, and in the case of celebrities, become a very public and ugly ordeal.

After the The Bachelorette’s Jillian Harris chose Ed Swiderski to be her life partner, rumors of infidelity started to surface. Then, at one of the recent Fashion Week shows in NYC, she was spotted with one of her former bachelors, Mike Steinberg, sparking rumors that maybe this reality couple may not actually walk down the aisle. Although both have refuted the rumors, you have to wonder if there’s truth to any of it. If we’ve learned anything from The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, it’s that you really need to put aside the glitz and glamour and take time to know each other before you make that lifelong commitment.

One celebrity who’s taking her time and not rushing into marriage is Shania Twain. After her marriage fell apart in May 2008, she has spent most of her time dealing with the fallout in private and is now finally happy again and out in the public eye. She just recently opened up about her relationship with Frederic Thiebaud (the ex-husband of the woman her ex cheated with—I know, confusing), and although rumors have been going around about an engagement, she claims they’re untrue. It seems like they’re just enjoying their time with each other and not worrying about the pressure to get married, which is a smart thing to do considering the circumstances.

It doesn’t matter how big or extravagant a wedding or engagement is—in the end, what matters the most is that you’re your relationship has a mutual understanding and acceptance of each other, respect and most importantly, an appreciation of what a long-term relationship really means.

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Posted by Samantha at 1:01 p.m. | Comments (0)

September 8, 2009

A Family Affair

Well it’s that time of year again! Once you’ve reached Labor Day weekend you know engagements-a-plenty are around the corner. With over 10% of Americans getting engaged during this time of year we also have Thanksgiving through New Year’s Eve to look forward to—an additional 19% of engagements for the whole year. I guess you can say for those in the industry, things get a bit insane right about now!

I was very happy to see that some of my fave celebs have tied the knot recently in some of the most elaborate, yet simply classic weddings I’ve seen in a long time! One in particular, Alyssa Milano, just married longtime boyfriend and Hollywood agent David Bugliari on August 15 in Bernardsville, NJ, at his family’s estate. David popped the question in December 2008 with a ring he designed with David Lavi in L.A. Alyssa was married once before to musician Cinjun Tate. She was also engaged to Scott Wolf back in the late 1990s.

Her first engagement ring was a vintage 1940s ring hidden in a pumpkin Scott had carved with a heart that read "Alyssa and Scott Forever." That engagement ended soon after, and so did her short-lived marriage to Tate. But, I get the distinct feeling that Milano has learned quite a bit from her former relationships and I have a good feeling about this one.

Milano showed off her incredibly classic yet elegant taste with her wedding theme and decor. Simply put, it was classic chic with a hint of vintage. She wanted the wedding to be a reflection of who they are as a couple, which is clearly family-loving down-to-earth folks who enjoy traditional large Italian dinners at her parents’ house on Sunday nights. Milano also wanted to incorporate a rustic feel to her wedding and that she did!

The setting—Bugliari’s family estate in New Jersey—created the perfect backdrop for Milano’s rustic wedding theme. The couple exchanged traditional vows under a wrought-iron gazebo decorated with willow, calla lilies and all kinds of roses. Colin Cowie helped achieve this look of understated elegance. Alyssa wore a custom Vera Wang gown, a vintage-looking headpiece by Maria Elena, and she held a bouquet of lily of the valley flowers as she walked down an aisle strewn with cream-colored rose petals and natural grass to the tune of John Lennon's "Imagine." Now, ladies—doesn’t that sound just perfect?

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Posted by Samantha at 4:17 p.m. | Comments (0)

August 26, 2009

Starting to Plan the Smart Way...

Labor Day weekend symbolizes the unofficial end of summer, and the beginning of the school year—and frankly, make me a little sad because I love summer so much, but one really nice thing is that 10% of Americans will get engaged over the Labor Day weekend holiday and so more wedding planning fun will begin! Most of these folks will be planning weddings for 2010 or 2011.

The key a great planning experience (and a great marriage) starts right here guys with good communication. A wedding is just the beginning of the many decisions you will need to make together as a married couple. When you start out your wedding planning by hiding your thoughts and feelings from your partner, you can be sure it will catch up with you both in the end.

If you find yourself nodding your head while you’re reading this, consider this exercise: When the excitement of your engagement dies down a touch, start by writing down what you want most for your wedding. Have your groom do the same. Then share these thoughts with one another and find out if you have any crossover—you might be pleasantly surprised—and then these parts of your wedding will be a piece of cake (pardon the pun!) When it comes to those items where you disagree—try narrowing down the most important items for both of you and seeing if you can compromise on these. This will be a good foundation for how you make collective decisions throughout your marriage.

Here’s what you shouldn’t do: Don’t start out by hiding things from each other! In other words, if you run out and buy a very expensive wedding dress; understand that you may be taking funds away from something else you want for your wedding, and most importantly, upsetting your partner.

Now—if you’re looking to cut corners on your wedding budget so you can afford those things you’ve outlined as most important to you either because you’re dying to get married at that restaurant on the water, or you wish there was some way you could stretch your wedding gown budget, here are some areas I think you could save without too much sacrifice—and without trying to pull one over on your partner!

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Posted by Samantha at 9:07 a.m. | Comments (0)

August 14, 2009

Mind Your Manners

When we work with clients, etiquette questions often come up in the planning process. They want to know things like where they should seat the single people, how to request money instead of gifts, whether or not they need to give favors, and do we need to let our guests bring a guest?

Yes, there are books out there that address many of these questions, but there are times when you just have to go with that gut feeling. Let’s take a look at a two situations I’ve encountered a few times and figure out how they should be handled.

First, let’s start with single guests. If you have a friend who has been dating someone for a significant amount of time, you really should let your friend bring that person. Yes, they are not engaged, but that person is an important part of your friend’s life. Who knows, they might just be headed in that direction some day. Wouldn’t you want them to do the same thing for you? If your friend just started dating someone, you might be inclined to just invite your friend based on the budget. It's not rude; it's reality. Not everyone has deep pockets today, and I’m sure your friends and family will understand. If they don't, it’s not your problem.

Now, what about requesting money instead of gifts? Many argue that this is the millennium and that many couples have lived on their own and have what they need, so why register? That’s a valid point. I went through the same thing when I was planning my wedding. Instead of just asking for money, which might make some guests uncomfortable, or going with the traditional registry, consider these two registry options:

1. You could register for big-ticket items like your honeymoon, luggage for the trip or even a pool table! Heck, I’ve had clients register for a new pool in their backyard! Or why not register for fun items, such as camping supplies, bikes, sports items and other things that are of interest to the both of you. If you don’t need the essentials, get creative with your registry. Just about anything can be added to a registry nowadays.

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Posted by Samantha at 12:30 p.m. | Comments (0)

August 4, 2009

Let’s Get Creative

It may just be me, but over the years it seems like we’ve lost our way when it comes to thinking of creative ways to tell our significant others how much we love them. Wedding vows are full of the same old sentimental words and many proposals seem more like Big’s casual “Wanna get married?” question to Carrie in Sex and the City.

Don’t get me wrong—I’m not saying that either of those things means any less than some huge production. I’m just wondering what happened to all the creativity?

Fortunately, my question was recently answered by two YouTube videos.

I’m sure you all know the JK Wedding Entrance Dance really well by now. Over 12 million people have viewed it and a spoof called the JK Divorce Entrance Dance has already been made. It just so happens that our special events coordinator's mother is a friend of the parents of the bride, so when we saw this we nearly lost it! But it was in a good way. I’m sure they never thought in a million years they’d get this much attention from a video they put up on YouTube for their friends and family. Just watching it inspires me to think of other ways to make the walk down the aisle fun and memorable.

The other video was of a New York man who decided to go for the whisper chain world record and propose to his girlfriend at the same time. He started the whisper chain with the question "Will you marry me?" and luckily for him the message made it through 59 people. Unaware of what was really going on, his girlfriend was the last to hear it and was completely surprised. Now that’s definitely different. Watching it gave me goose bumps! Check it out for yourself: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SdtR-hLoQE

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Posted by Samantha at 5:03 p.m. | Comments (0)