Blogs | Here Comes the Wedding | A Needle in a Haystack
February 20, 2008
A Needle in a Haystack
Sometimes that's what looking for the perfect wedding dress feels like...and it's not even mine!
This weekend I went gown shopping with my friend. Now, I’ve done this many times before and I’ve gone to numerous dress shops on many different days. I’ve pulled out, zipped up and hung up more dresses than I could count. I didn’t think this outing would be any different. I was wrong.
The one thing that separates this bride from the others I’ve shopped with is that she’s very specific about what she wants...and one of the most indecisive. I appreciate the part of her that refuses to settle and I understand why she does what she does, but that doesn’t mean my patience doesn’t get tested every time.
On this particular cold Saturday in February, this is the type of dress we were looking for:
- Small, in terms of volume. No fluffy princess dresses that could hide a million munchkins.
- Sleek and fitted like a mermaid gown but without a prominent fishtail.
- Sexy yet classy—nothing that screams dressed up on a street corner.
- Strapless with a sweetheart neckline OR spaghetti straps with a plunging back.
- Light fabric, something like a silk charmeuse OR lace.
- Beading details and sparkle, but nothing too gaudy or overwhelming.
We found two dresses that came close, and looked absolutely fabulous on her, but I could tell she wasn’t quite satisfied. They weren’t exactly what she was looking for and that look of glee I’d seen on other brides’ faces when they found “the one” never appeared.
My approach when wedding dress shopping is to just stand back and let the bride form her own opinion. I’ll offer my own when asked, or if she looks completely hideous, but I always avoid talking her in to loving something. It’s just not my place to make that decision for her. Since my friend was so uncertain about these dresses, she kept looking to me and asking what I thought. Before I knew it I found myself nudging her in one direction. Once I realized this, I knew I needed to stop and shut up. Picking this dress should be her decision and hers alone.
She wants her fiancé to be wowed when those church doors open, but I have a feeling he’ll be in awe no matter what she wears. She needs to remember that it doesn’t matter what other people at that wedding think or how they’ll react. In the end, the only thing that matters is that she’s happy and comfortable and feels pretty in her dream dress.
Needless to say, searching for her perfect gown was a tough task and was not accomplished in one day. By the end of it I was beginning to think a custom gown might be the way to go. Then, Monday night I got a call from her. She said she couldn’t stop looking at gown number two and that she wanted me to go with her to get it this week. I happily agreed and made plans to meet her Friday after work. The next day I got a voicemail message from her saying she wasn’t going to get the dress and that she found a few Jim Hjelm gowns she absolutely loved and wanted to try on.
I had a feeling that would happen.
Posted by Lori at 3:11 p.m.
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