Etiquette Q&A: "How Can We Request Money Instead of Boxed Gifts?"

Join us every Friday for our new etiquette Q&A column, where editor-in-chief Diane Forden answers one reader's biggest etiquette question. 

Q. Our goal is to buy a home soon after we marry, and we would like to use whatever money we receive at our wedding as a down payment. What is the proper wording on an invitation for a “greenback” wedding?

A. Sorry, but wedding invitations should not include requests for gifts of any kind. The only way to let guests know of your preference is by word of mouth. Friends and family members can inform invited guests that you’re planning to purchase a home and would prefer cash, but they should graciously add that any type of gift would be greatly appreciated. And I wouldn’t count on getting enough money for a down payment: Couples often overestimate how much they’ll receive. More than likely, you’ll have to save quite a bit more yourselves before reaching your goal.

—Diane Forden

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